The Departure Lounge: Mental Preparation
Christy:
If you're planning on moving abroad, you've probably got at least one really good reason. Perhaps you're moving for a job. Maybe your spouse lives overseas. Or maybe you just want an adventure. Whatever the reason, if you're going to move abroad and hope to make the very, very best of the opportunity, you need to be mentally prepared!
Mary of My Life in Scotland - our resident expat expert - has got some great tips for us on preparation. Hindsight is a great teacher, so let's see what her experiences with moving abroad have taught her.
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Mary:
Why
do you want to move abroad? What are your expectations? Why is it
important to you? These are all questions you should be asking yourself
{and answering} if you plan on moving abroad.
So,
why am I in Scotland anyway? Well, I met my husband online and after
1.5 yrs of dating long distance we decided to stop going back and forth.
We chose to get married and spend our time together. We had a dilemma.
LD was living in Scotland and I was in America. Where would we make our
home? After much research and deliberation, we decided I'd move to
Scotland. I wanted an adventure. I wanted to travel. I wanted to try
something new. And believe me...I got it. I've always
felt that you never come back the same when you travel. I always want to
be changing and getting better. I want to see how other's live. I want
to be a part of something greater than just my neck of the woods. This
is why being an expat is important to me.
Most
people envision expats as having an Eat Pray Love experience. Walking
through plaza's with a creamy gelato in your hands or sitting at a cafe
with your journal writing your novel with bagpipes in the background.
I'd say there is some of that, but it definitely isn't the norm. When
you move abroad there are some challenges.
Do
you know what culture shock is? Everybody thinks they are well adjusted
and they won't have any problems but let me tell you. You will. Of
course you will! You are in a country that isn't your own. They don't do
things the same way. Even if the people speak the same language--they
really don't. You will go through some culture shock.
Culture
shock will hit you in a variety of ways. It is different for everyone.
It hit me about a month after I'd moved to Scotland. I hadn't seen the
sky in 3 weeks and it had rained every single day since my arrival. I
felt trapped. What had I done? I still didn't have friends. I didn't
know my way around yet and I didn't have a job. I was wasting away. I
had expected to be sightseeing non-stop and had pictured myself with
many friends and a job by then {idealistic, I know!}. I was living in a
studio flat that smelled of mould. This wasn't what I signed up for.
If you don't want to see yourself packing up and going home you need to be prepared. Now answer these questions:
- Why are you moving abroad?
- What are your expectations?
- Why is this move important to you?
The
answers to these questions will be what keep you in the adventure and
not cutting your dream short. You'll be able to see it through and enjoy
it. For there is so much to enjoy!!
Here are some of my tips for keeping culture shock at bay {or keeping it to a minimum at least!}:
- Do your research before you leave. Find out what is around you. Grocery stores, banks, pubs, and the movies.
- Join a church or group of some kind. You need to be around people. Locals that can welcome and help you. You'd be surprise what can be cured with a good old fashion conversation.
- Find some kind of work. This doesn't have to be formal employment but something to keep you busy. Whether it is volunteering at the local food drive or writing a that novel. Get yourself something to do. Idle hands and all that.
- Before you move make a list of places you want to see. Whether they are right around you or take a bit of a travel. Make a list you can check off. You wanted to move so you could see new things, so see them!
- Learn about public transportation. Ask questions and read about it. Then try it out. Make it your friend.
- Decide what methods you will use to keep in touch with friends and family. Email, Facebook, Vonage and Skype are my chosen forms of communication. Oh and my Blackberry Messenger works abroad too! For free! I love this.
- Find other expats. You will feel a kinship with those from your home country. It will be helpful to have someone you can ask all manner of questions to. They will also help you exponentially with finding what you're looking for. They will give you the 411 on what to do and not to do. Use them.
- Have fun! If you wanted to walk with a gelato in your hands, do it! If you want to sit at a cafe drinking coffee and writing in your journal, do it! Just go out there and experience your new life as an expat. Carpe diem and all of that!
Christy:
I
haven't moved abroad yet. But I have worked away from home for extended
periods of time. Most of those times were absolutely fantastic, but I
remember two specific jobs that were really, really tough. I wasn't
prepared - not prepared for the region I was traveling through (weather and general conditions), not prepared to be away from everyone I knew/loved for quite so long at just that time. Just generally not quite equipped to handle what I'd signed up for. I don't want to repeat those difficult experiences, so I want to be sure I can cope, mentally, with what I'm signing up for this go 'round.
When
I move abroad next spring, I have several goals in mind. For me, this
adventure is a big part of the artistic process of my life. People
aren't meant to stay the same. We are always growing, changing and
stretching. And if we aren't doing those things we should ask ourselves
why not? Stagnancy is not healthy.
So what is it that I'm preparing myself for now? Why do I really want to move abroad?
Let's examine my motivations:
When I turned 18 I traveled abroad
for the first time. I spent three weeks on a whirlwind musical tour of
five European countries. It was amazing. I loved every minute. And I
knew that one day I had to go back. I never really thought travel would
become such a priority to me. Then around six months before my
twenty-first birthday I was offered a summer position working on cruise
ships. And I took the job. And I got on the plane six months later. And I
boarded the ship and did the work and loved it. And five years later I'd visited
forty countries and had become an entirely different person.
After
five years on ships I was ready for something else. I was ready to try
living a localized life, on land. Call it an experiment, if you will.
I'd call it successful. And now I'm ready for something else. Something
less structured. Something full of life and passion and freedom. Travel
has always sated that wild hair in me that aches for the unknown. My
trips overseas during my five years in California have taught me
repeatedly that I feel like my best "me" when I'm traveling. Those trips
have also shown me that I haven't seen enough. The more I see, the more
I discover that I haven't seen anything yet.
So that's why I'm moving abroad. Because exploration is my motivator. Knowing that, I know what to prepare for.
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