United Airlines, I've just about had it with you. Despite our 31-year history, I'm ready to call it quits.
I've been flying back and forth between coasts on your jets since infancy. I remember thinking your stewards and stewardesses were some of the funniest, most friendly people I'd ever met as an adolescent. When you rolled out the in-seat entertainment systems, I was around 16 years old and ever-so-grateful. And I was astonished by the in-seat phones as a kid(though I never used them) and loved to play with them during flights after you were so kind to install them. I remember when you used to serve complimentary honey roasted peanuts (The cliche was real!) and pass out free headphones for the movies. There were meals on most flights! And they were included in the price of the flight. (Sorry, that's about what they were worth, too... except when you had McDonald's Happy Meals onboard for us kids for a while... that was kind of awesome.) I was one of those wide-eyed six-year-olds the Stewardesses (yes, they were called Stewardesses then) invited to meet the Captain and tour the cockpit. A few times. I loved my stick-on pilot wings.
Over the past year I've found myself increasingly hesitant to fly you. You started charging for the first checked bag. Then you refuse to offer a free first checked bag to your Mileage Credit Card holders. I can fly Delta with a free first checked bag, thanks to my Delta credit card. Then you introduced the garbage that is Economy Plus and decreased my legroom by half
Then your website became really aggressive, trying verrrrry hard to sell me stupid services I neither want nor care about. I mean, really, you want to charge me $100 bucks for "premier" flight status - the "priviledge" to get on the plane five minutes before anyone else and POSSIBLY go through the faster security line. GIVE ME A BREAK.
Your suckage is really getting on my nerves.
Today I decided to pull the trigger on a fun weekend in LA: meeting up with a friend and heading to Disneyland. I had some United Airlines Miles to use up, so I figured I'd book my flight through you.
I get totally through the mileage booking process and am informed that because my flight is less than 21 days away I have to pay a rush fee for ticketing of $75. SEVENTY FIVE DOLLARS. For a flight that should cost less than $75 were I paying cash for it. It's the principal of the thing...
Let's think about this: The flight is like 55 minutes in the air, tops. It should be seriously cheap. Except these days no one is offering the flight cheaply - It's going for about $150, which is ridiculous to begin with.
Sure, you might say, $75 is still half the going rate for the flight. Yes, I say, it is, which is why eventually, after calling to complain and ask very nicely if the fee can be waived because it's stupid (to a quasi-idiot call center representative somewhere in India who is unhelpful and gives me attitude) I paid the money and got my ticket.
But guess what United, after this flight I'll be canceling my credit card with you and actively avoiding your flights for both personal and business purposes. I'm breaking up with you. And any mileage I might accrue with Star Alliance in faraway places will NOT be spent on your airline.
Sure, you may not care, after all, I haven't flown with you a whole lot over the past couple of years. But even that's entirely your fault.
NB: After booking, I was informed by the friend who would be picking me up at LAX that she wanted me to fly into John Wayne/Orange County instead... bit late there. Oh well. I called United to see if anything could be done about changing the ticket without additional fees. Turns out it wasn't a problem since both airports were in the same metropolitan area. I'm still breaking up with United, but thought it was only fair to point out there was one positive to this flight experience.
PPS: This trip actually happened last week, I scheduled this blog to be published after the trip. You should know this about the flight: After boarding we were de-planed because the plane had no brakes. That's right. No brakes. We swapped planes with a flight bound for Jersey and arrived two hours late. Good one, United.
I've been flying back and forth between coasts on your jets since infancy. I remember thinking your stewards and stewardesses were some of the funniest, most friendly people I'd ever met as an adolescent. When you rolled out the in-seat entertainment systems, I was around 16 years old and ever-so-grateful. And I was astonished by the in-seat phones as a kid(though I never used them) and loved to play with them during flights after you were so kind to install them. I remember when you used to serve complimentary honey roasted peanuts (The cliche was real!) and pass out free headphones for the movies. There were meals on most flights! And they were included in the price of the flight. (Sorry, that's about what they were worth, too... except when you had McDonald's Happy Meals onboard for us kids for a while... that was kind of awesome.) I was one of those wide-eyed six-year-olds the Stewardesses (yes, they were called Stewardesses then) invited to meet the Captain and tour the cockpit. A few times. I loved my stick-on pilot wings.
Over the past year I've found myself increasingly hesitant to fly you. You started charging for the first checked bag. Then you refuse to offer a free first checked bag to your Mileage Credit Card holders. I can fly Delta with a free first checked bag, thanks to my Delta credit card. Then you introduced the garbage that is Economy Plus and decreased my legroom by half
Then your website became really aggressive, trying verrrrry hard to sell me stupid services I neither want nor care about. I mean, really, you want to charge me $100 bucks for "premier" flight status - the "priviledge" to get on the plane five minutes before anyone else and POSSIBLY go through the faster security line. GIVE ME A BREAK.
Your suckage is really getting on my nerves.
Today I decided to pull the trigger on a fun weekend in LA: meeting up with a friend and heading to Disneyland. I had some United Airlines Miles to use up, so I figured I'd book my flight through you.
I get totally through the mileage booking process and am informed that because my flight is less than 21 days away I have to pay a rush fee for ticketing of $75. SEVENTY FIVE DOLLARS. For a flight that should cost less than $75 were I paying cash for it. It's the principal of the thing...
Let's think about this: The flight is like 55 minutes in the air, tops. It should be seriously cheap. Except these days no one is offering the flight cheaply - It's going for about $150, which is ridiculous to begin with.
Sure, you might say, $75 is still half the going rate for the flight. Yes, I say, it is, which is why eventually, after calling to complain and ask very nicely if the fee can be waived because it's stupid (to a quasi-idiot call center representative somewhere in India who is unhelpful and gives me attitude) I paid the money and got my ticket.
But guess what United, after this flight I'll be canceling my credit card with you and actively avoiding your flights for both personal and business purposes. I'm breaking up with you. And any mileage I might accrue with Star Alliance in faraway places will NOT be spent on your airline.
Sure, you may not care, after all, I haven't flown with you a whole lot over the past couple of years. But even that's entirely your fault.
NB: After booking, I was informed by the friend who would be picking me up at LAX that she wanted me to fly into John Wayne/Orange County instead... bit late there. Oh well. I called United to see if anything could be done about changing the ticket without additional fees. Turns out it wasn't a problem since both airports were in the same metropolitan area. I'm still breaking up with United, but thought it was only fair to point out there was one positive to this flight experience.
PPS: This trip actually happened last week, I scheduled this blog to be published after the trip. You should know this about the flight: After boarding we were de-planed because the plane had no brakes. That's right. No brakes. We swapped planes with a flight bound for Jersey and arrived two hours late. Good one, United.
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